8:24
I haven't slept well.
there were mosquitoes.
so, I woke up early and walked the dog.
I bought oatmeal milk. had a coffee and a cig.
I saw a young man working out early in the morning outside alone. he looked serious about his fitness. he looked committed and persistent. I wish I'd be that serious, committed and persistent about my fitness as well.
the foods I have
quinoa and peas, Brazil nuts, walnuts, raisins, apples, bananas, grapes,
dates, carrots, lettuce, radishes, tomatoes, cilantro, and parsley.
from tomorrow, I can work out. I might do it tomorrow. I need to fix the motorcycle.
maybe I should sell the motorcycle.
I should journal or have/ do Hitbodedut.
maybe I'll write more sentences to read before a cigarette
I remember there's a blessing to say before a cigarette
it didn't help in the past
PRAYER TO BE SAID BEFORE EACH CIGARETTE
Master of the world, grant me the merit to leave this bitterness, which embitters my life day after day, the terrible cigarette, that blocks the name of G-d. Its name [sigaria in Hebrew] describes what it is, sagar- [closed, in Hebrew] -Ka [G-d’s name].
And save me quickly so that I am saved from this terrible poison which is against the words of our Holy Teacher (Rebbe Nachman of Breslov) who forbade us from smoking.
And grant me the merit the fulfill the words of our Teacher who didn’t want us to smoke at all.
And grant me the merit to pray over every cigarette before I smoke it, that I should be saved from the terrible harm that every single cigarette causes me.
And may I see miracles and wonders that I should really quickly completely stop smoking. And I should also pass around this prayer to others to say so that they can pray it before they smoke every cigarette. And they should immediately stop smoking b’siyata d’ishmaya,
“HASHEM IS GOOD TO ALL, AND HIS MERCY IS ON ALL HIS CREATIONS”.
1078/30295
18:58
I went to the tent of the families of the hostages
I knew there would be food
I brought a pack of washed apples ( last time I brought grapes)
so, I went to HaKosem is Sarona to eat pita with hummus and salads but it wad closed.
so, I went to the tent to see what food there was
there was buffet
I ate 2 plates
then later a cake, and another cake and another cake and coffee from the 7/11
I almost asked for a cig from a volunteer
but
I also contributed
I handed yellow ribbons to people, offered songs to the singer and keyboard player,
took 2 pictures to hang in Bat Yam.
any way.
I got home, tired, and managed to take a nap
before the second alarm (of rockets coming ) for today.
I've already walked her 4 times today.
and I will walk her before going to bed
tomorrow I have an offer to volunteer
by the way, having this dog is part of my volunteering
tomorrow it's working in agriculture
I think I'll go for it.
1079/30295
19:08
it's 19:09. I read OA steps for 30 minutes.
I was too lazy to eat green leaves
I think, that when I want food, when I think of food, when I'm hungry - I need to eat.
but - I need to eat fruit, vegetables, water, clean foods. this is the secret. I think. it's something to practice.
it's nice not to eat until there's a real hunger and not bored for example, but, the next step is to then choose healthy food. it may not be condensed food, maybe high-water food, but it might satiate the hunger and keep me lean.
this is something I need to practice
to eat a higher volume of high-water foods.
that might help me to lose fat.
1080/30295
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